K.H.Wilson
(
khw@ukc.ac.uk
)
Mon, 13 Jun 1994 09:43:35 +0100
>
>-----------------------------------------------------------------------
>-----------------------------------------------------------------------
>---------- Star Trek: The Next Generation ----------
>---------- Episode XX: Share Minds but Kill the Kid ----------
>-----------------------------------------------------------------------
>-----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>
>Scene 1:
>
>[Sickbay...Kirk Enters]
>
>Kirk: How is she Bones?
>
>McCoy: Well, Jim, I gave her a sedative but she keeps rambling on.
>
>Troi: oh..pain...share minds...never got to share....mommy...
>
>McCoy: I told Nurse Chapel to leave. 'Mom' that is. I don't get the
> connection but it was driving Chapel crazy.
>
>Kirk: [rubbing his chin] Share minds...hmm...What does she mean by
> sharing minds?
>
>McCoy: I'm not sure...It's like nothing I've ever encountered.
>
>[Kirk presses button on wall intercom]
>
>Kirk: Kirk to Spock...
>
>Spock: <>
>
>Kirk: Come to sickbay. We want you to help us with Troi.
>
>Spock: <>
>
>Kirk: Explain.
>
>Spock: <>
>
>Kirk: Hmm...Let him talk to Scotty.
>
>Spock: <>
>
>[After a minute, Spock enters sickbay]
>
>Kirk: Spock, we need you to mind meld with Troi here. Find out what you
> can.
>
>Spock: Acknowledged. [places fingers carefully on Troi's face] Our minds
> are getting closer and closer...
>
>Troi: Yesss...Share minds...
>
>Spock: ...Our minds are wow! [a smile appears on Spock's
> face. He starts to blush, and he begins to shudder uncontrollably.
> Spock's face begins to moisten with sweat, and both eyebrows are
> 'jumping' up and down. Finally, after three minutes, the contact
> is broken, though Spock's odd grin persists]...oboy, oboy, oboy!
> Errr...I mean fascinating.
>
>Troi: Oh yes! Joy! Pleasure! Satisfaction! Wonderful! Gratitude!
> Again!! [Chapel enters] Mom!! [Chapel exits, blushing] Confusion...
> dismay...pain...oh the pain!! [Spock proceeds to mind meld again]
> Yes!! Joy! More!!
>
>Kirk: Keep her quiet and give me a report in an hour, Mr. Spock.
>
>Spock: If you...uhhh...insist.
>
>Kirk: Bones, lets go check up on Wesley.
>
>[Exit]
>
>=======================================================================
>
>Scene 2:
>
>Scotty: ...an' if ya ever try ta do that again, I'll take ya by yur
> bloody hair and send ya into space and torp' you, ya little...
>
>[Kirk enters]
>
>Scotty: Captin'! Thank God yur here!
>
>Kirk: What happened?
>
>Scotty: Well, this little brat came down here an' used this here device
> ta make it sound like your voice, tellin me to come up to the
> bridge. When I found out you were in sickbay and that Wesley was going
> ta meet me, I ran back here but Wesley locked the Engineering doors.
> It took me a good two minutes to reprogram the computer to override
> Wesley's practical joke.
>
>Wes: I'm sorry, but gee, it was fun!
>
>Kirk: Take it easy Scotty. He really meant no harm.
>
>Scotty: Aye Captin, but the little bugger better watch his step, or I
> might use the transporter to get rid of his brain.
>
>[Wesley and Kirk leave Engineering]
>
>Kirk: Wesley, you better watch what you do around here. Another stunt
> like that and you will be confined.
>
>Wesley: Gee, Captain, I only want everyone to know how smart I am. [he
> looks up at Kirk at notices hair] Gee, you having hair problems?
> Picard did too, 'cept he didn't use a toupee. He's a real boring
> guy. Hey how's Troi?
>
>Kirk: [Yelling and waving arms in old dramatic-Kirk-like fashion] Listen
> Wesley, *you* have the opportunity...to make something of yourself.
> Don't blow it by doing stupid things.
>
>Wesley: Gee, you don't have to be so dramatic...
>
>Kirk: [slamming Wesley into corridor wall] Listen you stupid little
> jackass! After Charlie X, Trelayne, Miri & Jahn, and the children
> from Triacus you're nothing. If you ever try to get wise to me or
> to any of my crew, I will put you over my knee and ......[high pitched
> whistle from intercom]...[pushing intercom button]...What!?
>
>McCoy: I'm in sickbay, Jim. Sorry to disturb you, but its Spock.
> I..I think you better get down here.
>
>Kirk: Why? Has Spock died again?
>
>McCoy: Now!
>
>Kirk: On my way.
>
>[Kirk, followed by Wesley run into the turbo-lift]
>
>=======================================================================
>
>Scene 3:
>
>[Sickbay, Kirk and Wesley enter]
>
>Kirk: What is it Bones ohmygodisthatspock?
>
>Wesley: Gosh!
>
>[Kirk and Wesley look in shock at Spock and Troi]
>
>[Spock is sitting next to Troi. They are both smoking a cigarette, and
> Staring into one another's eyes. Spock has the biggest grin on his face.]
>
>McCoy: Well, Jim, Spock seems to be in total bliss. I haven't
> encountered anything like this since you and that Deltan. I
> think Spock's life is in danger.
>
>Kirk: Don't spend too much time worrying about it Bones...Spock will pull
> through...He's a regular. However, I think I will need some time
> alone with Troi, in my quarters.
>
>Wes: Oh yeah! Jimmy boy is gonna do Troi!
>
>Kirk: [aside to Wesley]...shut up kid!...
>
>=======================================================================
>
>Scene 4:
>
>Chekov: Cowordinites Captin'?
>
>Kirk: Hmmmmmm...
>
>Sulu: [to Chekov] I don't understand it. He's been like that after that
> session he had with Troi.
>
>Chekov: [shruggs, and repeats] Cowordinates Captin'?
>
>Wesley: Yo Captain! The ruskie asked you for coordinates!
>
>Kirk: [Suddenly remembering where he is and what he should be doing and
> that the kid is still on his ship] Set a course for the neutral zone.
> [presses button on chair] Scotty, I need maximum warp now!
>
>Scotty: <>
>
>Kirk: [almost whispering into chair intercom] Look, do you want to get
> rid of the kid or not?
>
>Scotty: <>
>
>Wesley: Warp 11 is impossible!! Maximum logical warp is 10, stupid! I
> should know.
>
>Kirk: [into chair intercom] Security, come to bridge and confine
> Wesley. Strip search him and I want a twenty-four hour watch on him.
>
>Security Head: Aye, Sir.
>
>Kirk: Uhura, send a message to starbase 5, code 2, that the highly
> valuable commodity, Wesley, is aboard, but we are having engine
> problems and are heading for the neutral zone.
>
>Uhura: But sir, the Klingon-Romulan Empire have broken code two a long
> time ago.
>
>Kirk: I know [smiles to Uhura].
>
>=======================================================================
>
>Scene 5:
>
>[Exiting warp speed...]
>
>Spock: We are in the neutral zone, Jimbo.
>
>Kirk: [To Spock] Jim! You used to call me Jim! Remember? [sighs, and
> then speaks into chair intercom] Scotty, I need you to transport Wesley
> into the first Klingon ship that enters transportation range, and then
> get us out of here.
>
>Scotty: < bad...>>
>
>Uhura: Klingons are hailing us.
>
>Kirk: On viewer. [she does and nods]
>
>Klingon: This is Captain Dk'ls of the starship Tr'gn, representing the
> Klingon empire. Your presence here is an act of war. Give us the human
> known as Wesley or prepare to die.
>
>Kirk: [in chair intercom] Now Scotty! [turns] Go Sulu!!
>
>[Woooossssshhhhh!!!!!]
>
>============================================================================
>
>Scene 6:
>
>[In a more computerized looking universe...]
>
>Picard: What's wrong with you.
>
>Crusher: Shouldn't you be on the bridge? You're supposed to be monitoring
> the reattachment of the saucer section.
>
>Picard: No need. Its on automatic as usual. I'm let Riker think he's doing
> it manually and...What's wrong?
>
>Crusher: Dammit, its my son! Why did you get rid of him?
>
>Picard: I got rid of them so we could have better adventures. Troi was
> driving me crazy, and your son was such a brat. C'mon, we are finally
> alone...no Wesley...no crises...lets get under the covers and...
>
>Crusher: [pushing Picard into the wall] You had no right to do that! He
> may of been a brat, but he was *my* son. There will be no future between
> us until you get my son back!! Don't come to me to console you during
> your next crises!!!
>
>Picard: Oh alright. [Pressing insignia] Riker. Picard here. Re-seperate
> saucer section and lets go back and get Wesley and Troi.
>
>===========================================================================
>
>Next Episode...Klingons, Peace, Pain, oh the pain!
>
>===========================================================================
>
>/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
>| To be continued....|
>\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/
>
>
>This episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation, has been created, thanks
>to the following older episodes:
>
>Trek Classic (old series) Diet Trek (cartoons) {Same old ST with a
>========================= ==================== bit less Trek than
>Charlie X More Tribbles, More Troubles usual}
>The Squire of Gothos
>The Naked Time
>The Deadly Years
>Miri
>This Side of Paradise
>The Trouble With Tribbles
>Ellan of Troyius
>The Enterprise Incident
>Let That Be Your last Battlefield
>And The Children Shall Lead
>The Savage Curtain
>...and all the other episodes in which Kirk gets lucky...
>