The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk
)
Thu, 31 Oct 1996 22:10:58 +0000
Hiya All...
This one came from Guy...ages ago...!!!
Wishes & Dreams...
- ANDREA
xx
*************<andrea@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk>*************
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*******************Internet Goddess********************
**********************ANDROMEDA************************
------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------
Bill Gates dies in a car accident. He finds himself in purgatory, being
sized up by St. Pete.
"Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call; I'm not sure whether to
send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by
putting a computer in almost every home in America, yet you also created
that ghastly Windows '95. I'm going to do something I've never done
before in your case; I'm going to let you decide where you want to go."
Bill replied, "well, what's the difference between the two?"
St. Peter said, "I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly, if it
will help your decision."
"Okay then," said Bill, "Let's try Hell first."
So Bill went to Hell. It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear
waters and lots of bikini-clad women running around, playing in the
water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining; the
temperature perfect.
He was very pleased.
"This is great!" he told St. Peter. "If this is hell, I REALLY want to
see heaven!"
Heaven was a place high in the clouds, with angels drifting about,
playing harps and singing. It was nice, but not as enticing as Hell.
Bill thought for a quick minute, and rendered his decision.
"Hmmm. I think I'd prefer Hell," he told St. Peter.
So Bill Gates went to Hell.
Two weeks later, St. Peter decided to check on the late billionaire to
see how he was doing in Hell.
When he got there, he found Bill, shackled to a wall, screaming amongst
hot flames in dark caves, being burned and tortured by demons.
"How's everything going?" he asked Bill.
Bill responded, "This is awful! This is nothing like the Hell I visited
two weeks ago! I can't believe this is happening! What happened to
that other place, with the beautiful beaches, and the scantily-clad
women playing in the water?!???
"That was a demo," replied St. Peter.