The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk
)
Thu, 23 Oct 1997 13:24:03 -0400 (EDT)
Hiya Folks...
How do you know if you're dating a hockey player...???...thanks to Alan,
now we can all find out...
Wishes & Dreams...
- ANDREA
xx
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------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------
The Top 15 Signs You're Dating a Hockey Player
15> Eating the last Fig Newton gets you bodychecked into the fridge.
14> He's very sensitive on the topic of "stick curvature."
13> When eating steak, asks you to chew it for him.
12> After going out, makes you line up and shake hands with all his
ex-girlfriends.
11> Constantly gets the urge to whack "Whiskers" out the cat door
with a broom.
10> It's bad enough he consummates lovemaking by shouting, "He
scores!" -- was it really necessary to install the red light
above his bed?
9> During arguments he sends you to the penalty box for "2 minutes
for pissing me off."
8> Her name is Olga, she's built like Stallone, and she starts a
fight at least once per period.
7> He refuses to valet park the Zamboni.
6> For breakfast, he hands each kid a spoon and tosses an Eggo in
the middle of the table.
5> For your anniversary, gives you a charm bracelet made of his
teeth.
4> When he tries to "Marv Albert" your back, there's absolutely
no danger of him breaking the skin.
3> Demanded credit for an assist when you slept with his best
friend.
2> Favorite Restaurant: Dinner in a Blender
and the Number 1 Sign You're Dating a Hockey Player...
1> Talks funny and likes to beat up people, but doesn't come from
Alabama.
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