The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk
)
Wed, 22 Jul 1998 21:00:46 +0100
The Loony Bin - http://eleceng.ukc.ac.uk/~pjw/loonies/
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Hiya Folks...
Here is some cowboy wisdom we can all learn from...
Wishes & Dreams...
- ANDREA
xx
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*** THE LOONY BIN ***
*** loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk ***
*** Archive: http://eleceng.ukc.ac.uk/~pjw/loonies/ ***
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*******************Internet Goddess********************
**********************ANDROMEDA************************
------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------
Cowboys will be cowboys
"A Cowboy's Guide To Life"
.... by Texas Bix Bender
Never squat with yer spurs on.
There's two theories to arguin' with a woman; neither one
works.
Don't worry about bitin' off more than you can chew.
Your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger'n you think.
If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, ..try
orderin' somebody else's dog around.
After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he
started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and
shot him.
The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop
diggin'.
Never smack a man who's chewin' tobacco.
It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.
Never follow good whiskey with water, unless you're out of good
whiskey.
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes
from bad judgment.
Always drink upstream from the herd.
Never drop your gun to hug a grizzly.
If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now
and then to make sure it's still there.
When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person,
don't be surprised if they learn their lesson.
When you're throwin' your weight around, be ready to have it
thrown around by somebody else.
Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin'
it back in.
Always take a good look at what you're about to eat. It's not
so important to know what it is, but it's critical to know what
it was.
The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and
put it back in your pocket.
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
Finally, never kick a fresh cow chip on a hot day.
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