The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.com
)
Fri, 10 Sep 1999 02:08:18 +0100
The Loony Bin - http://loonies.net800.co.uk/ Hiya All... Here are some more of our favourite quotes to live by... Wishes & Dreams... - ANDREA xx *********THE LOONY BIN****loonies@bloodaxe.com********* *** *** *** Archive: http://loonies.net800.co.uk/ *** *** *** ************ANDROMEDA******Internet Goddess************ ------- Forwarded foolishness follows ------- - Blessed are those who hunger and thirst, for they are sticking to their diets. - Life is an endless struggle full of frustrations and challenges, but eventually you find a hairstylist you like. - Perhaps you know why women over fifty don't have babies: They would put them down somewhere and forget where they left them. - One of the life's mysteries is how a two pound box of candy can make a woman gain five pounds. - It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions. - I finally got my head together, and my body fell apart. - The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing in the right place, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment. - Time may be a great healer, but it's also a lousy beautician. - Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever. - Age doesn't always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone. - Life not only begins at forty, it begins to show. - Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today. - Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain consciousness. - If at first you don't succeed, see if the loser gets anything. - You don't stop laughing because you grow old; you grow old because you stop laughing. - I don't mind the rat race, but I could do with a little more cheese. - I had to give up jogging for my health. My thighs kept rubbing together and setting my pantyhose on fire. - Amazing! You just hang something in your closet for a while, and it shrinks two sizes. - It is bad to suppress laughter; it goes back down and spreads to your hips. - Age is important only if you're cheese or wine. - The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby. - Freedom of the press means no-iron clothes. Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but she can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate cake. - Can it be a coincidence that "STRESSED" is "DESSERTS" spelled backwards. Please include this information if you forward this joke: ********************************************************* This joke and others like it, can be found in: The Loony Bin http://loonies.net800.co.uk/ ********************************************************* ______________________________________________________________________ To unsubscribe, write to loonies-unsubscribe@listbot.com MSN Messenger Service lets you stay in touch instantly with your family & friends - Visit http://messenger.msn.com