Business Technology...

The Loony Bin ( loonies@bloodaxe.com)
Tue, 25 Nov 03 08:25:54 -0000


Hiya Folks...

While it would be hypocritical of us not to recognise the benefits
brought by the internet, let's not forget that the old-fashioned way can
work just as well...

Wishes & Dreams...

- ANDREA
        xx

******* THE LOONY BIN **** loonies@bloodaxe.com
 *******

         Archive: http://www.theloonies.co.uk/


*********** ANDROMEDA **** Internet Goddess ***********

  ------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------


Business Technology
-------------------

An unemployed man goes to apply for a job with Microsoft as a janitor.

The manager there arranges for him to take an aptitude test (Section:
Floors, sweeping and cleaning). After the test, the manager says, "You
will be employed at minimum wage, $5.15 an hour. Let me have your e-mail
address so that I can send you a form to complete and tell you where to
report for work on your first day."

Taken aback, the man protests that he has neither a computer nor an e-
mail address. To this the MS manager replies, "Well, then, that means
that you virtually don't exist and can therefore hardly expect to be
employed."

Stunned, the man leaves. Not knowing where to turn and having only $10
in his wallet, he decides to buy a 25 pound flat of tomatoes at the
supermarket. Within less than 2 hours, he sells all the tomatoes
individually at 100% profit. Repeating the process several times more
that day, he ends up with almost $100 before going to sleep that night.

And thus it dawns on him that he could quite easily make a living
selling tomatoes. Getting up early every day and going to bed late, he
multiplies his profits quickly. After a short time he acquires a cart to
transport several dozen boxes of tomatoes, only to have to trade it in
again so that he can buy a pick-up truck to support his expanding
business. By the end of the second year, he is the owner of a fleet of
pick-up trucks and manages a staff of a hundred formerly unemployed
people, all selling tomatoes.

Planning for the future of his wife and children, he decides to buy some
life insurance. Consulting with an insurance adviser, he picks an
insurance plan to fit his new circumstances. At the end of the telephone
conversation, the adviser asks him for his e-mail address in order to
send the final documents electronically.

When the man replies that he has no e-mail, the adviser is stunned,
"What, you don't have e-mail? How on earth have you managed to amass
such wealth without the Internet, e-mail and e-commerce? Just imagine
where you would be now, if you had been connected to the Internet from
the very start!"

After a moment of thought, the tomato millionaire replied, "Why, of
course! I would be a floor cleaner at Microsoft!"

Moral of this story:

1. The Internet, e-mail and e-commerce do not need to rule your life.

2. If you don't have e-mail, but work hard, you can still become a
millionaire.

3. Seeing that you got this story via e-mail, you're probably closer to
becoming a janitor than you are to becoming a millionaire.

4. If you do have a computer and e-mail, you have already been taken to
the cleaners by Microsoft.


Please include this information if you forward this joke:
 *******************************************************
     This joke and others like it, can be found in:
                     The Loony Bin
             http://www.theloonies.co.uk/

 *******************************************************
 To UNSUBSCRIBE or SUBSCRIBE email: loonies@bloodaxe.com

          Subject: 'unsubscribe' or 'subscribe'