The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk
)
Wed, 3 Jul 1996 05:42:24 +0100
Hiya Folks...
Here's a letter from a mother to her son...
Wishes & Dreams...
- ANDREA
xx
************<andrea@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk>************
******************<ajc6@ukc.ac.uk>*******************
*** ***
*** THE LOONY BIN ***
*** loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk ***
*** ***
******************Internet Goddess*******************
*********************ANDROMEDA***********************
------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------
LETTER FROM A WEST VIRGINIA MOTHER TO HER SON
Dear Son,
I am writin this slow cause I kno you can't read fast. We don't live
where we did when you left, Your Dad read in the paper where most
accidents happen within twenty miles of home, so we moved.
I won't be able to send you the address cause the family that lived here
took the numbers with them foe their next house so they wouldn't have to
change their address.
This place has a washin' machine, The first time I put four shirts in
it, pulled the chain, and haven't seen them since.
It only rained twice this week, three days the first time, four days the
second time.
The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt Sue said it would be too
heavy to send in the mail with all them heavy buttens, so we cut them
off and put them in the pockets.
We got a bill from the funeral home, said if we didn't make the last
payment on Grandpa's funeral bill, up he comes.
About your father he has a lovely new job, he has over 500 men under
him, he is cuttin' grass at the cemetery.
About your sister she had a baby this mornin', I haven't found out
whether it is a boy or girl, so I don't kno if you are an aunt or an
uncle.
Three of your friends went off the bridge in a pickup, one was drivin',
the other two were in the back, the driver got out - he rolled down the
window and swam to safety, the other two drowned, they couldn't get the
tailgate down.
Your Uncle John fell in the whiskey vat, some men tried to pull him out,
but he fought them off, so he drowned. We cremated him, he burned for
three days.
Not much more news this time, nothin' much happenin', Write more often.
Love
Mom
P. S. I was goin' to send you some money, but the envelope was already
sealed.